Noticing the Signs - A Personal Story

For those of you whose children's special needs aren't physically noticeable, at what age did you suspect there was something different about your child?


For both of my boys, the father was concerned about their lack of normal speech at 18 months old, but I was fine with the fact that they could communicate their needs with me. It took a while after that before I was ready to find out if the lack of speech was something more.  The older boy was normal in almost every way aside from his speech at that early stage - or so I thought. He did have a habit of playing NEAR other children, but not WITH them. When I took him for the speech evaluation at 3 years old, the avoidance was what tipped the psychologist off that he was on the spectrum.

How to be a Friend to Someone with Autism

My posts may come a bit slowly between now and Thanksgiving week, because of family business and because of the busy business of getting my younger son settled into the right therapy program for him. That being said, I just want to leave you with some good resources that I've found which I believe will be informative and useful for parents, caregivers and strangers who will eventually become friends of our children.

The first of these posts is a .pdf  brochure  about being a friend to a person who has autism:


How To Be A Friend To Someone With Autism

Play

Play

 

Play for me is where the thinking drifts off in floating clouds above

Where I can be me in unity of peaceful things, I love.

Entertaining self in the world of play emitted from life’s exposure

Allowing words and thoughts to be created by me the great composer

Oblivious to those around me as if they don’t exist

Playing with my inner thoughts of things I cannot resist

Lining them up in playful order comes a pattern to my eyes

When one comes and alters the purpose of my visions simply dies

For me pleasure comes from the way my play is to be

Sit quietly and observe what I am learning about me

Patterns. Patterns everywhere cause my adrenaline to consume me

Patterns are my favorite play, creating it in ways it was meant to be

Allowing myself to be alone to discover what my play is meant to bring

For inside myself this play of mine brings me happy things.

Written by Sondra Williams 

Resource: Child-Autism, Adult-Cafe

"Minority" Children Are Underrepresented in Autism Identification

During a conversation with my speech and language advisor today, she stated that I was lucky to have gotten my little Spectrum child involved with intervention services so early. I had to pause for that one, because the child in question is three years old, and the older son also began being assessed at three years. Back then (>10 years ago) I did attempt to get my little boy involved a year earlier, but a policy was in place for all children which allowed assessment only after 36 months. Not knowing that some policies had changed, I waited until this past summer to have the younger son assessed.

Wrightslaw Yellow Pages For Kids

This site was shared with me, and now I definitely want to share this page with you! Find local or nearby resources for children with disabilities in this national directory. From the home page:

"Find educational consultants, psychologists, educational diagnosticians, health care providers, academic therapists, tutors, speech language therapists, occupational therapists, coaches, advocates, and attorneys for children with disabilities on the Yellow Pages for Kids for your state.

You will also find special education schools, learning centers, treatment programs, parent groups, respite care, community centers, grassroots organizations, and government programs for children with disabilities."

Wrightslaw Yellow Pages For Kids

Soothing the Gut, pt 2

In Part 1 of this series, I mentioned that my boys were part of the numbers of Spectrum children who experience bowel issues. My older child improved because of holistic interventions we used that helped him to relax and eliminate. My younger son has been a bit more tricky, and I've been using nutrition as the main intervention. Here's what's been working:

Beatitudes For Friends Of People With Disabilities

Blessed are you who take the time to listen to difficult speech,
If I persevere, I can be understood. 

Blessed are you who never bid me to "hurry up"
Or take my tasks from me and do them for me.
For I often need time, rather than help. 


Blessed are you who stand beside me as I enter new and untried ventures, Myself and You. 

Blessed are you who ask for my help.
For my greatest need is to be needed.

Blessed are you who, with a smile encourage me to try once more. 

Blessed are you who never remind me
That today I ask the same question twice. 

Blessed are you who respect me and love me just as I am. 


 Author Unknown 


Resource: Child-Autism, Parent-Cafe

On The Vaccine Question

I know this is a hot topic for some of us, but since I haven't mentioned it yet, I figured now was as good a time as any to place it on the table.

Soothing the Gut, pt 1

Parents of spectrum children will know that stomach problems are a common issue in our little ones. My older son experienced problems with his bowels soon after birth, and with the younger one, it started one day when he was 18 months old and still breastfeeding, and it didn't stop.

Should You Explain The Diagnosis To Your Child?

I sometimes wonder whether I should give my children an official-sounding explanation of their diagnoses, or if we should treat their symptoms as simple personality differences. As far as we're concerned here at home, everyone is just being unique and relating in each one's own way. My older son is no different after his diagnosis than he was before his diagnosis, neither is the younger one.

Caring For Your Autistic Child

I don't necessarily agree with many of the ideas presented in the following article, specifically the ones that discuss the impact autism has on the family.

Some Days Can Be Overwhelming...

... but we are resilient. We press through them.

Autism is not an easy diagnosis. The symptoms are sometimes not easy to manage. But we still press on.

The past two days have been stressful. My younger spectrum child was in a state of agitation the first day, and that agitation evolved into full blown crisis on the second day when he met his assigned pediatrician for the first time.

Checking In With Ourselves About Our Parenting

Parenting skills are important in any family. For spectrum families, vigilance is even more important.

Revisiting Happiness With Chalk

Seeing my child use a writing instrument properly for the first time set me to work on a simple home improvement project that (I hope) will enhance his communication skills.

Paper Mache For My Paper Shredder

I used to cry when he devoured my books and magazines. I've now learned how to manage this trait.

When he started shredding, I thought it was a phase that all young children go through. Little babies love to play with boxes and paper, often displaying a special brand of delight when opening neatly wrapped presents.

My child ignored the boxes and went directly for the paper.

Random Moments of Happiness

Today I took my son to see his new nutritionist for the first time. I had no idea how he would behave (his experience with autism can be filled with spontaneity and unexpected surprises). As is common with my child, he was curious, spirited, and self assured. As soon as he walked through the door, he was off to make contact with everyone in the office, explore his surroundings, and generally assert himself.

Yes, I Love My Autistic Child

I love my autistic child.

Yes, every day is stressful for me.

No, I do not hold his symptoms against him.

Yes, sometimes I feel like there is no hope.

No, I will not give up on him.

Yes, he is difficult to handle.

No, I do not hide him from the world.

Yes, my heart breaks every time he destroys things.

No, I don't stop hugging him.

This is simply my baby.

I believe he has a bright future ahead of him.

I will not stop working to teach him and guide him into the great person he is destined to become.

I love my autistic child.